while we're on the topic // todd

[Scarlett Anne Owens]

Scarlett was cleaning the house. Rearranging throw pillows, dusting shelves, doing the dishes. So long as she kept steady and took frequent breaks, it wasn't too tiring. She started the cleaning when she came home from the library and realized that since last nights accident, neither mom nor dad had time to tidy up. Yesterday's dishes were still in the sink.

She was still in jeans and her boots, lying on the couch (her feet dangling off the sides so that they wouldn't touch the fabric) taking deep breaths. In the rhythm of her breathing she lost track of time, until at some point she heard footsteps coming towards the front door. Holding her breath she waited - if it was someone she knew, they'd know to just walk in; if it was someone different, they'd ring the doorbell and she'd have to get up. She really didn't want to get up.


[oc: this site is very addictive outfit =) ]

[Todd Stephen Owens]

OUTFIT

Since dad was sleeping at the station and mom had been working double shifts at the hospital, Todd figured he should stop by and check on Scarlett. The house looked quiet,but her car was in the driveway, so he went up to the door and let himself in. "Hey Letty?" He called as he shut the front door behind him.

The house was really clean given that their parents were so busy. He realized that meant she must have done the cleaning... "Did you clean the house? I hope you didn't tire yourself out." Todd was a worrier when it came to Scarlett. It didn't matter that they weren't related by blood, they were super close and he couldn't stand the thought of her being out of his life.

He found her on the couch, she looked tired. Todd frowned lightly, hoping she didn't push herself too hard, they didn't want a backward slide.

[Scarlett Anne Owens]

Scarlett forced a smile. Not that she wasn't happy to see Todd, but mostly she wanted him to stop worrying. Everyone had done enough worrying about her - last year was a very tough year on the whole family. "I'm fine." She assured him, "It was only the dishes." She started getting up to show him it was okay. "I haven't eaten yet, though, want a sandwich?"

A more mischievous crept onto her face as she made her way past Todd. This one sincere. "How was work today? Meet any nice cats?"

She didn't need to guess that there wouldn't be much to eat, but there was peanut butter, whole wheat bread slices, and organic grape jelly. It was one of the only organic things in the fridge because mom had just went on the organic kick, but hadn't gone a full supermarket run yet. Scarlett carefully took the ingredients out of the fridge.

[Todd Stephen Owens]

Todd chuckled. "Oh yeah, many nice cats, and a baby. Yeah, I've stooped to cradle robbing." He said, following her into the kitchen. It wasn't like she needed his help or anything, and she probably wouldn't collapse or anything, but he felt compelled to follow, but he'd let her make him a sandwich so she didn't feel like he was babying her.

"I'd love a sandwich, its where women belong right, in the kitchen," He joked. Todd thought nothing of the sort, besides, he was gay, he had no thought about women taking care of him at all. He ran his fingers through his hair as he watched her open the fridge. "Mom still on her organic kick?" He asked, eyeing the ingredients. He liked eating crap, even if it was crap.

He pushed up his sleeves and went to the cabinet to get too glasses. "What do you want to wash that down with?" He asked, getting out the milk for himself. Strong bones and what not.

[Scarlett Anne Owens]

"Oh yeah. Making sandwiches, cleaning the house ..." Scarlett murmured sarcastically, giving Todd's milk a quick look of disdain. She hated plain milk. "I didn't realize I had fallen straight into that stereotype." But if they were on the topic of stereotypes, "Would you like a feather boa while I'm humbly making the sandwiches?"

Browsing the contents of the fridge once more, Scarlett managed to pull out some chocolate milk. A quick inspection told her that it was good for another week. "Yeah - and she's been taking natural vitamins made out of wheat grass and ... stuff." Honestly Scarlett had no idea, and her mind was failing her because of strain.

She placed the chocolate milk by the glasses Todd took out, and made her way towards the section of the counter where the bread, peanut butter, jelly, bread knife and cutting board were waiting for her. Slowly, she lifted the bread knife with determination, but after a moment of hesitation, she put it back down and just clutched the counter edge, eyes closed.

[Todd Stephen Owens]

"Oh yes, I'd love a feather boa, since I'm such a diva. It should be pink." Todd teased back, rolling his eyes. They often played with stereotypes like this. Neither meaning any harm of course, he wasn't offended and he knew she wasn't either. He poured her chocolate milk into the glass and went to put them away, pausing when he saw her grip the countertop. She didn't have the energy to spread peanut butter? Oh this was bad. Bad, bad, bad..

"Scarlett?" he asked, immediately going to her side, trying to size up how bad this was. She probably needed blood sugar. "Come on," he said, putting an arm around her--he'd carry her if he had to. "Lets get you sitting down and I'll make the sandwiches." All of this was reminding Todd of some of the worst times during her whole illness, times when she thought she could do things and you hoped but then even small tasks were crippling and painful.

[Scarlett Anne Owens]

Scarlett leaned her head into Todd's chest. "As if boas come in any other color." She muttered, eyes still closed. But she didn't say anything else. There was a darkness creeping up on her that had nothing to do with the fact that she wasn't seeing anything. It was starting in her extremities and making then go numb. An image popped into Scarlett mind, of the hacker site before shed logged in. The way it looked as if the screen was failing. But then was no password Scarlett could use for what was happening now.

There was the same time limit though. Ten seconds. Numbness turned to weakness, her mouth became salty the way it normally was before she threw up, and she begged some higher power to just let her lay down and be still. Cold sweat broke out over her forehead and the universe was swirling in her head, until everything just stopped.

Her body went slack.

[Todd Stephen Owens]

Todd was not prepared for this, a quip about boas and then his sister's body going limp in his arms. What had happened? Would she be alright? He placed his first two fingers on her neck, she still had a pulse. Good. Breathing? It seemed so. He brought her to the couch and laid her down on it, not worrying about her shoes or anything. He fanned in front of her face with his hand lightly. She just fainted Exhaustion? Heat? The AC was on but maybe she had a fever.... He put a hand to her forehead. Nope.

It wasn't like she hadn't fainted before, but it still scared him, made him jumpy. He still moved like a cop, but he always wanted to call an ambulance, make sure someone was looking after her. He really debated hiring a private nurse or something. He went and got her a glass of water for when she got up. Maybe she was dehydrated. Hard to know what would have set this off exactly. Todd was strong and rarely got sick, and if so, not for more than a few days at most.

He removed her shoes and put her legs on the arm of the couch to help get blood flow back to the brain. She'd come around, but he wasn't gonna leave her side until she did.

[Scarlett Anne Owens]

The time she was out for was only five minutes, but like any encounters with unconsciousness, there was no sense of time. In retrospect sometimes, Scarlett speculated that was what death was like. No sense of anything. Of course you couldn't recall it when you were alive and conscious, because the brain couldn't grasp ... pure nothingness.

To Scarlett, one second she was seeing a cutting board, the next she was staring at the living room ceiling, but she knew what it meant. A sort of momentary depression coursed through her, and she blinked back tears. She really didn't want this anymore. Dwelling in self-pity, it took her a minute to realize that Todd was somewhere around here. So she snapped out of her little world of misery.

And oh, she noticed as she turned her head, Todd was actually right there. She smiled. Of course he'd be right next to her. "I must be a sucky women if I can't even finish a sandwich, huh?" Time to put on a brave face.

[Todd Stephen Owens]

Toss chuckled softly. "How about I make the sandwiches and you wear the feather boa?" He said with a smile. He handed her the glass of water and got up, knowing she might wanna be alone to process for a moment. It was the first time she'd fainted in a while and she probably thought it was over, Todd knew he felt that way. He just wanted her well again.

And while he was making the sandwiches he realized that he did have a feather boa, except it was blue and prank gift from a friend who made them all dress in drag one halloween... He shook his head and finished the sandwiches, cutting them into triangle because he liked them better that way.

Carefully balanced he brought the plates and their milk into the living room and placed them on the coffee table before sitting in an armchair. "Can I get you anything else?" He asked lightly.

[Scarlett Anne Owens]

Scarlett slowly sat as Todd went away, her mind a hailstorm of thoughts. Every thought hurt. I shouldn't have cleaned the house. I shouldn't have tried to prove to Todd that was ok. I did too much, that's all it is.

It was a formula for Scarlett. It had to be, because then the only other answer was unthinkable. At least with a formula she could pretend that if she added up the numbers correctly, she could move on. But the alternative meant ... it meant that ...

Scarlett's eyes stung. It meant that she was still weak. It meant that she was stuck in her limitations. It meant - a single tear rolled down her cheek - that some days would just be bad days, and no matter how she added up things up, there was no way to avoid it. Scarlett tried to keep her breathing steady.

Milk and sandwiches materialized in front of her. Was she hungry? Did she want to eat? Not really, but she had a feeling she probably ought to. "No, no thank you." She said softly, still staring at her hands.

[Todd Stephen Owens]

Todd looked at her carefully. The poor thing looked upset, broken, like something had just occurred to her. Todd was pretty sure he knew what too, though it was something he was trying to never consider... She might never be 100% again. She was so young but already she had to think about what was worth it to do, what she had the energy for. It reminded him of a kid in high school who explained it through spoon theory. Scarlett realized she only had a few.

Todd hoped that would change though, it was possible wasn't it? He bit into his sandwich and hoped she'd eat. Maybe she wasn't hungry, but she needed the energy, he was sure about that. Todd realized that sitting and watching her carefully wouldn't make her feel better so he leaned back, trying to seem passive in the whole thing.

"Wanna watch something?" He asked, figuring that was a passive activity they could do together and it wouldn't tire her out any.

[Scarlett Anne Owens]

Scarlett hardly registered the question when she shook her head no. Still staring at her hands, she decided to stop being stationary and picked up her sandwich. She ate without really tasting it, but occassionally annoyed by the way the peanut butter was sticking to the inside of her mouth. She wordlessly finished one triangle and slowly drank about a quarter of her chocolate milk.

The combination of the fat from the milk and the peanut butter made her feel very full very quickly. It was uncomfortable. She looked around frustrated as is some great answer was floating through the living room. "I think I'm going to go to bed." She declared, not meeting Todd's eyes. Her own gaze lingering on the staircase. "Could you carry me?" she asked quietly, having resigned to her state.

[Todd Stephen Owens]

"Sure," Todd said gently. Remembering the worst of her illness. And for a moment, he decided he was okay with his life. Sure he worked long hours, and he hated being single, but not having much of a personal life away from his family gave him the ability to take care of her. Scarlett would hate knowing that though, she'd claim she was a burden and never call him. Todd wouldn't let that happen.

He put one arm under her neck and the other under her knees, lifting her up into his arms. Todd held her to his chest for a moment before starting up the stairs. She was so light... not as light as she had been during the worst of it, but still frail to him. He debated making some comment about carrying bricks in her pockets but decided the small affirmation of wellness wouldn't help right now.

Once up the stairs, Todd turned toward her bedroom and laid her down on her bed, smiling softly, maybe a little sadly too. He brushed her hair out of her eyes. "I love you sis." he said.

I never want anything bad to happen to you again.

[Scarlett Anne Owens]

Scarlett wondered while he carried, if he ever really carried anyone else. Over the year he had carried her a lot, and always it was a sad occassion. Had he ever carried anyone when it was meant to be fun? Well, now that she thought about it, there was that one time he tossed into the ocean water. That was a family beach day.

The familiar softness of her bed somehow multiplied her exhaustion. She knew that she could fall asleep very quickly. Now that she was in her small haven, the sadness turned into a sort of peaceful reconciliation of her life. And it was still raining outside, fitting to her mood.

His words had done it, though. Scarlett started crying. "I love you, too!" she managed in between breaths. Clinging to him, arms wrapped around his neck, she buried her face in his chest.