nicole // sweet like sugar

[Nicole Marie Freeman]

A bit of anger flared up and Nicole retorted before she could stop herself. "They had you when they were seventeen. Then they had me when they had their own place and issues and kept me around to get tax deductions." It was an unfortunate bit of information that she pieced together from things yelled at her during drunken rages.

She regretted the little outburst and stopped herself from adding, that's hardly better isn't it? She clenched her jaw once more and stared at the ground. There was no way she was going to screw up the one potentially positive relationship in her life.

When she realized they were exchanging information, Nicole sat down, thinking it seemed more natural talking eye to eye. She had already known how old he was, but she didn't know his exact birthday. Gay? Really? Huh, she would've never been able to tell. Kids, paperwork, community service ... wow. What a wholesome guy. Were they really related?

If he was adopted at twelve that means that until Nicole was seven years old, they had actually lived in the same city. That was strange and painful to think about. Did they ever pass each other on the street?

But before Nicole could dwell on that, she realized it was her turn to speak. What could she say about herself? "I'm 21 and umm ..."
really what could she say about herself? "I'm a good cook." One wouldn't be able to tell by her attempted badass appearence, but home ec was one of the only classes she really excelled at. "And I like listening to Elvis."

There was a lot she wasn't telling him because she didn't want to scare him off and because he was a cop. I can handle a gun ok, but I can handle a switchblade really well. I grew up familiar with gang activity and violence. I can tell good drugs from drugs cut with a lot of crap, but I don't mess with the stuff. I've been abused. I've been neglected. I've gone hungry. I ended up learning to take care of myself. I've had serious relationships but I've broke them off before they lasted too long. And she also didn't want to share that stuff with him because she was starting a new life. Maybe he was going to be part of a new life. In any case, she wanted to burn the memory of what she went through before today.

"Oh, and until a month ago my hair was bright turquoise."

And I've got two other tattoos.

[Todd Stephen Owens]

That was a start. They were getting somewhere, even if it was superficial right now. Ages, fun facts. He felt like a kid starting college or camp and doing awkward ice breakers with random strangers. Only Nicole wasn't a stranger you could just walk away from. Tax deductions, so their parents were crap, he could sort of tell by her appearance and the way she acted... Did she have a record? Todd made a mental note to look her up and find out.

He started to pick at his take out again. He hated small talk, even though they would have to work their way up to the really serious stuff. They didn't even know the basics, but he wanted to launch into stories of his childhood, hear about their apparently god awful parents.

He sighed and gave her an uncomfortable smile. It was hard to small talk with someone you wanted to talk about deep, important things with. "So... Elvis is cool." he nodded slowly. Todd liked Elvis christmas songs, more fun.

God this was hard, like family reunions on television shows. He chuckled softly at the thought.

[Nicole Marie Freeman]

"So ... Elvis is cool."


Okay. Nicole could see where this was going. "I don't really know how to make small talk." she told him outright. If this was going to get superficial and weird than it was only going to steadily bother her. Her life experience told her that people made awkward small talk when they wanted something from her, but were just distracting her in the mean time. Nicole preferred blunt honesty, despite the shock and drawbacks it normally had.

"I mean ... I'd like to get to know you. But if you want to know something specific, I'll just tell you if you ask ... or we could put it off until we have coffee. I'm fine with whatever." she explained, hoping she wasn't being too blunt. Sometimes she tended to rub people the wrong way.

She looked around his office. It wasn't super neat, but it wasn't super messy. It was the mark of a nice guy. Cared enough to keep it from getting too sloppy, but wasn't neurotic or OCD enough to be a freak about it. Laid-back but responsible. Nicole was used to figuring people out discreetly - information was valuable. Knowing things was important. It gave her more ways to stay safe.

[Todd Stephen Owens]

Todd chuckled softly, something they had in common. "Same goes here," he said. It wasn't that he was so terrible at small talk, there was just so much he wanted to know, so much to understand and wonder about. Talking about Elvis and her hair seemed just too unimportant given they were long lost relatives.

He was quiet for a moment, and then he just spoke, whatever came to him next. "I never thought I'd get adopted, I thought I'd live in that orphanage forever. Twelve is an old age to get adopted, I'm still not sure why they adopted me... maybe they wanted a big brother for their little girl and I didn't look too damaged..." Todd set down his chop sticks and leaned back in his chair, eyes closed.

"The Owens were the best thing that ever happened to me. In the orphanage I acted a big brother to all of them, they got so sick of me... and I hated to see them go, one after the other, new boys filling their place.... I'm a good brother you know...." Then he remembered she was his sister, she had no idea what kind of brother he was. Did it make him a bad one that he never looked for her, even though he didn't know she was alive?

"I suppose I always wanted my real parents to be bad news, messed up, so they were doing me a favor by giving me up.... but its really not that comforting to know I was right...."

[Nicole Marie Freeman]

Nicole nodded in certain places, just to show she was listening. It was strange but interesting to hear his story. She knew she had a brother for a while, but she didn't really know anything about him. All this time she imagined him and his life in many different ways, but now she was hearing the actual truth. It took the mystery out of it, and made a fantastical situation into a real life issue. Instead of imagining different things now, she'd have to deal with it like everything else.

He was probably adopted because he was such a nice guy. (Or was he a nice guy because he was adopted?) Odd, that was a bit of hard thinking Nicole didn't want to get into right now.

Owens. Looked like nice people. Of course he was a good brother - public servant who liked kids? He was probably a good everything.

Nicole shrugged though, at the comment about the parents. It was rather a long story. "They didn't used to be, I don't think. They were a normal teenage couple ... had a fluke with birth control or something ... knew they couldn't take care of you. But then they were out in the real world, trying to make ends meet. Dad started dealing drugs for money. He and mom started 'trying' the products out before selling ... to make sure they were good. Then they became junkies and wasting money on drugs. I was one of their clever ideas to same money. Have a kid to pass less taxes. Same reason dad shot himself in the foot - for disability benefits.

"Mom mentioned you once when she was drunk, and I couldn't believe I had a brother somewhere. Any time I asked, though, she wouldn't say anything about it. I didn't know your name or your birthday."

"But I found her medical records, somewhere in boxes in the basement. Filled with mail and other stuff they ignored. I knew she was in the hospital the 11th and the 12th. It was the year I knew you were born. I wasn't sure which was your birthday.

"Last year I broke into the orphanage you used to be at, and went through their files and found you. You got a few days after your birthday - I figured it had to be you. I got a name and an address. I thought that if I actually asked them about you they would tell me I didn't have any right to contact you. So I found out you lived here. I Googled and saw that you were one of the cops, so I figured I ought to visit you here, if at all, instead of showing up at your house."

And that was her story of him.

[Todd Stephen Owens]

It was interesting to be a figure of such mystery, the lengths she had gone through to find him, to find solace in a broken household. Neither of them were wanted children, not really, and his poor druggie parents... their parents... weren't good for either of him. He had a flash, a vision of how satisfying it might be to arrest them....

"I don't miss them," he said of their parents. "I don't know them... and I love my mom and dad... so, whatever they are now, whatever they were... that's not my reality."
That was never his life. "They must have been rotten to you... have you just been running since you were 18?" At 18 she would stop being a tax deductible, right? Where was she going? Did she have plans? Or was she going to fall into a similar pit as their family? Todd could feel his cop, big brother, savior instinct .. or complex... kick in.

[Nicole Marie Freeman]

Nicole nodded. Their parents didn't really deserve to be missed, although Nicole still felt sympathy towards from time to time. They just got sucked into something very bad and very dangerous and they couldn't let go. It was a bit tragic. But she'd probably hate Todd if he was sympathetic towards them when he didn't even know them.

"I turned 18 in the middle of high school. I finished school and then I left. I stayed in the city for a while. Worked sometimes. Had dead-beat relationships. I checked in on mom and dad sometimes, usually when I know they'd be passed out. Just to make sure they didn't die." It was incredibly likely.

"But then last year I had enough of everything. Checking up on mom and dad. Dead-beat relationships and jobs that went nowhere. So I broke into the orphanage and then I left. I've been roaming north for a while, and now I'm here."

Nicole was thinking this was probably the longest meaningful conversation she had with anyone. She was wondering what he thought of her. It was encouraging though that he hadn't said anything particularly negative towards her yet.

"I make jewelry sometimes. Weird stuff out of things I find. Bottle caps. Floss. I sold a bunch of stuff at the Renaissance Faire a month ago. I've got a bit of money for now. But I was thinking of getting a job somewhere here in New England. I don't want to go back to the city."

[Todd Stephen Owens]

Tod nodded quietly. Obviously, she was a bit of a troubled kid, checking in on dead parents, full of second hand smoke and trashy thoughts, had broken into an orphanage and was held back in high school. Not an easy life, and he tried to turn off the desire to arrest his whole family. He'd been a cop so long... he still wasn't sure how he felt about her taking his information though.

"I have a friend who work's at Crazy Beans.. the coffee shop on Main street, I could put in a good word for you." Todd offered. Not like he knew her, or what kind of worked she was. She was a thief and a runaway and not college educated... Not like he was typically educated either. "But you'd have to promise not to steal anyone else's info," he said not unkindly.

"And theirs a consignment store down the street from there, maybe you could sell your jewelry there." He offered. She couldn't sleep on his couch or anything, but he'd help her this much.

[Nicole Marie Freeman]

Nicole looked at Todd strangely, not quite sure if she hadn't just suddenly gone hard of hearing. Her brows furrowed and she pursed her lips, and given that she had rather full lips, it looked like she was pouting. She turned her head a bit, as though she was studying him from a critical angle. Was he considering the implications of the things he was saying.

"You..." Nicole stammered with the following words, unsure how to properly phrase her incredulity. "You're saying you'd help me get a job ... here? ... In this town? ... Where you live ... and your family lives ..." What if she ran into them? What if she came across him on a daily basis? It was bad enough she just popped into his life, but did he really want her to move into his town? That was like life intrusion.

But while she was mildly outraged, she was thinking about it. She'd walked around the town just today. It was cozy and clean and pretty. She had actually gotten coffee at Crazy Beans, and it seemed like an artsy place that played atmospheric music. She could see herself working there. Maybe she'd get an apartment with a balcony, like she saw walking down that one street. She'd set it up all nice and make jewelry there on her days off. She could see it ... it looked like such a nice life.

Nicole's expression softened as she thought about it. Todd had a pretty good life here, despite where he came from. Who knows? Maybe this town was magic. Maybe people's lives changed here.

[Todd Stephen Owens]

Todd hadn't quite thought about that. Her running into Scarlett, her running into his parents, her suddenly being a part of his life. But now that she was here, he couldn't imagine her just disappearing. Life didn't work like that. "You're in my life now, you want to better your life and I will help you. My family is going to have to know about you." Who could he talk to about this beside maybe his parents? He couldn't keep a secret this big from them all.

"I'm not saying stop by my office with plates of cookies like Scarlett does, I'm just saying I'd help you get a job." He said. Nicole couldn't become his sister overnight....

[Nicole Marie Freeman]

Nicole had actually planned to just disappear after this, but maybe it was time to break that old habit. That was how a new life worked, right? Get rid of the old life, learn from your mistakes, break bad habits. Maybe if she was serious about a new life, she'd have to do things that seem unpleasant. Staying and dealing with her relationship with Todd, even if she felt uncomfortable about his family ...

Nicole swallowed and nodded, staring firmly at his desk. This was going to be hard. She was feeling a bit annoyed with him that he was helping 'to better her life.' She wasn't a basket case that needed his high and mighty attention. She'd taken care of herself all these years, hadn't she? She could've ended up a lot worse. A stripper, maybe. On drugs. Knocked up.

"Thank you for your help." was all she said though, not wanting make their situation more tense. However, in saying what she did next, she couldn't hide the fear in her voice. "I don't have to ... meet your parents, do I?"

[Todd Stephen Owens]

"We'll cross that bridge when we come to it," Todd said. If they came to it. If they ended up hating each other, they would move on with their lives, but if they became friends, then how could she get away with never meeting his family... right?

He looked at the clock, he had so much work to do and he still hadn't eaten. he had a long shift ahead of him. "I'll talk to my friend at the Crazy Bean and tell you when he can meet with you, and when I'm free for coffee," He said with a little smile and nod.

"I really gotta get to this," he said, gesturing to a small stack of paperwork. Todd awkwardly held out his hand for her to shake goodbye since they were so not at a hugging place. "It was ....interesting, meeting you."

[Nicole Marie Freeman]

At the first sign of goodbye, Nicole jumped up. She checked her pockets to make sure she had her phone. She hesitated before shaking his hand briefly. Weird, this was the first time she touched her brother. "Yeah ... same." she said awkwardly. With a small nod she made her way out his door.

She walked out of the office, out of the station, out into the night. She didn't really have a good handle on the town yet, so she just walked around. Somehow she ended up in the center, suspecting most of the roads led that way anyway. She reached into her back pocket and took out a pack of cigarettes. She lit one up and inhaled. Lost in her thoughts, she stopped somewhere in the middle of the square. Absentmindedly she stared at a random rock. Back in the city, this thing would long have graffiti all over it. Small town people were strange - what made them keep a rock around?

She sat next to it and smoked. At least it might keep her company. "Better my life ..." she muttered and glanced at the rock as if to say can you believe it? "I'll better my life." she said, sounding resolved. She looked at her cigarette - she'd feel kinda bad discarding it on the ground. It was such a clean little town. Seeing the nearest trash can, she mushed it against the side and then tossed the butt into the can. She walked in search of a bar, even a cute town had to have one.